Not an endorsement, grain of salt

So for the last few weeks, I’ve been trying out CBD Marijuana. I live in a state that it is legal. I just go to the shop and buy some. I’m lucky to have people close to me that are knowledgable on it and give me recommendations for doses and what everything means. I’ve been going through some hard things personally on top of hypo-mania. When I’m stressed I don’t eat and don’t sleep. This is a huge red flag. I have tried smoking before throughout my life but never knew there was a difference between CBD and THC. From what I’ve been told the THC affects your mind but the CBD calms your body. Mania usually starts from not taking care of your body, eg sleeping, and eating. So when I’ve tried it before it was legal and just regular THC weed I always become very paranoid, scared, and uncomfortable. I longed to have the relaxing effect others seemed to get. The last few weeks have been life changing. I can relax and eat and sleep. I smoke at night and just take lithium now when before I had to take Klonopin, an anti-anxiety medication, and Risperadol, an antipsychotic that was ruining my life. It’s nice to find a balance with no side effects that have made me unable to maintain my work and life schedule. I use it purely as medicine for now. I don’t have an addictive personality so I can’t see myself doing it socially or at any other time during the day that I don’t need hunger and relaxation. Again I’m not saying this will cure you. Different things work for everything, but I do believe marijuana has helped many people with many things. It is a drug like any other drug I’ve taken and you have to be responsible with it. I’ve met so many people who do use it for their mental health issues as well as physical issues, there are however people I’ve met that use it as a crutch to deal with everything in life. I can say my only current crutch is cigarettes which I do use to deal with stress. Usually, I smoke cigarettes in the Spring when my stress is high but due to other big changes in my life, I am extended that into Summer. I’m also lucky to have an open relationship with my Psychiatric Nurse Practitioner whom I saw just the other day and let her know. She was supportive and reassured me that whatever helps me she will support as long as it doesn’t hurt me. I am full of love today and relaxation regardless of the mess I’m currently in. Here’s to taking a moment during the battle to be free. Until next time.

About lifewithbipolardisorderweb

I am a free-spirit, minimalist, and loner. INFP, Pisces, Ennegram 4.
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